When Negativity Becomes Love

love_is_all_you_need-395349For many years my focus has been to be of service.  How I have expressed it has changed but underlying it all I know it’s where I am to focus my energy.  Over the last few months I realized that it’s not really about service, it’s about holding the space for love.

My friend really drove that home for me a few weeks ago and I am seeing it in a whole new light. Between my friend and a serious mediation practice I am seeing why love is so important.  I want to hold the energy of love in all things I do and say although I have fallen off the love wagon a few times I will always climb back on.

It’s not always easy to feel love when others are spewing hateful things at you or negatively accusing you of being something they perceive you as being. It is not easy to put yourself out there and allow others to decide if you are good enough.

Recently, my guidance was to put out a channeled video and to be honest I didn’t want to do it but my guides said it would help many.  My spiritual counsel also said some may be angered by it but I trusted my guidance and just did it.  I put myself out there even if it was something the human part of me didn’t feel safe doing.

What I didn’t expect was that the gift would be in the negative comments.  As I was watching all the anger and hatred on Facebook and on YouTube I realized that if I could feel love and compassion for others, no matter what, I am living in my authenticity.

I have seen a few articles and posts about lightworkers that only see the light and love are not helping anyone because there is so much darkness in the world. You can have light and love and see the darkness.  What displaces darkness the most is love. If I see the sick and impoverished as victims I am taking their power away.  If I feel love and compassion I am helping them discover something loveable about themselves.

I would never deny there is pain and suffering in this world.  If you come from love it doesn’t mean you ignore those things, it means you have compassion and love and step in if you feel called to do so.

The beauty of earth is that most of us can choose what we are passionate about.  If my friend is passionate about animal rights and I am passionate about racial rights is one of us wrong?  What if she’s always posting on Facebook and sending articles about animal cruelty should I tell her she should stop focusing on the animals and deal with the GMO problem? We are diverse in our passions and that is a gift!

I have seen too much hate and anger lately and it hurts so much.  I feel the pain others are in and I want to give them a hug.

For me, the gift in the hatred is that I have decided that next year I am going to focus on one thing I am passionate about and do what I can to help spread the word and take action. In the action I will be in love while doing it and not in blaming or shaming anyone else.  I want to be in love while being in service and that is all.

Follow Your Guidance Even When You Don’t Want To

Follow Your Guidance Even When You Don’t Want To

DSCN0297Back in 2005 my guides kept telling me not to just go to Sedona, Az but to bring a group of people with me.  That was the craziest idea I had ever heard because I had never been to Sedona and I didn’t know anything about the area or how to run a retreat.  This was way out of my comfort zone, how could I pull something like this off?

I started researching and reading books about the area and the energy there.  I looked into hotels and car rentals as well as what to do while there.  I had everything in place so I created a flyer about the retreat.  I added all the things we would do and experience.

Now came the hard part, advertising and telling everyone about the retreat.  This was a huge risk to for me!

Everything was done, I had a place for us to stay, car reserved, schedule set, all I had to do was hit the send button on an email and it would be done.  The fear inside told me to stop, don’t do it This fear was saying things like: “They may not like you” and “No one will sign up”.

So here I was, conflicted between the voice inside my head yelling at me to run and hide and my guides and angels telling me to trust and it will all be OK.

I was so afraid and I just could not bring myself to be vulnerable and let people know about the retreat.   In meditation, one day, I told my guides and angels if they really wanted me to do this they had to give me a sign.

That day I was riding in my car and I heard on the radio “there is an accident on Sedona Ave” Ok I thought, that was interesting!  I’ve never heard of that that street before.  (I looked later and there is no Sedona Ave in my area or my state, haha)

That evening I was in a class and someone brought out a huge magazine and said “Have you ever seen this magazine before?” and right at the top, in huge letters was SEDONA!  I about fell off my chair, I turned to my friend and said “Can I get any bigger sign?”, and we laughed!


Ok, they made it really clear they wanted me to do this.  OMG I’m going to do this… and I did.  It was not easy and it was not perfect but it was the best decision I’ve made.  It showed me how to trust my guidance and trust that I am being taken care of.  I still question my guidance but usually follow through on it anyway.  My thought is, what does it matter if the guidance is wrong?  My ego wants me to believe that my higher wisdom isn’t to be trusted but I remind myself not to give into that fabricated belief.

Trust is so difficult for us as humans because our ego is constantly telling us to be afraid and not to take risks.  Taking a group to an area of the country I had never been to was a tremendous risk and really scary.  I wasn’t sure what I was doing or how I would pull it off.  If I took these people there I would have to drive them around, take them to places I’ve never been and lead them in meditations.  This was crazy and risky.

I have mentored many people over the years and they always tell me that they know what their guidance is and that they want to follow it but they are too afraid to do so.  Yes, there is always a risk but I have found that the bigger risk is listening to the fear.  Recognize that there is always an unknown in life, always!  In all honesty, you don’t even know what will happen in any given day, at any given time.  You may think you know that at 8pm your favorite TV show will be on but instead the President is having a conference.  Yup even when you are sure, you are never really sure.sedona rainbow

We are here to get outside our comfort zone to take risks and to push beyond our limitations.  The world is an illusion and if you trust more in your higher guidance and less in the ego fear your life will be more exciting and fun!

Comment Below with questions for me or share your stories about following or not following your guidance!

Bell Rock in Sedona- As high as I would go

Bell Rock in Sedona- As high as I would go


Sedona- Adventure at Spiritual Retreat

Is He or She the ONE??!! The Ultimate Betrayal

Is He or She the ONE??!! The Ultimate Betrayal

As an intuitive I get this question so often I have to take a breath and make sure I’m not experiencing Ground Hog Day.  The situation is that there are too many lonely, sad people who just want to be loved.  I totally understand this feeling, we all crave love, connection and want to feel like we belong.

The problem with asking the question of “is he/she the One” is that when we ask that question we are focused on the outcome and the expectations of who and what “the One” is.  We feel this desperation and a need to fill a void in our lives.

If you focus on the outcome you miss the whole experience of getting to know someone. 


If you have a physical attraction and an emotional and spiritual connection that’s awesome but why worry if they are ‘the one’?  If you start filling your head up with the idea of what ‘the one’ for you would look like, sound like and act like, you are not getting to know the person in front of you.  You are projecting the need for them to be ‘the one’ and not really seeing them for who they are.

How will you know if they are the one if you keep focusing on the wrong thing?

Eventually they will not meet up to your projections and expectations of who you want them to be and you miss out on a new experience with a new person. You never really get to know them, you just focus on them being ‘the one’.

If you are asking every person and every psychic if they are ‘the One’ you are putting your energy in your hopes and dreams and not in your relationship.  You are focused in the wrong direction, try to focus on what you like about the person, not what you want them to be like.

The ultimate betrayal is when you betray yourself.

Once there was a women who would talk to her boyfriend on many different occasions about getting married and being together.  Each time the boyfriend danced around it and avoided answering or making a direct statement.  In her mind they are discussing marriage but in reality she was discussing marriage and he was avoiding it.

This woman was not consciously dating, she was unconsciously projecting what she desired and hearing only what she wanted to hear.  She was not seeing the real story or who he really was.  She was only seeing her expectations and needs, not the truth.  She was lying to herself if she believed he was as invested in marriage as she was!

The deception is hypnotizing.lovers in park


We lie to ourselves about many different relationships because we are programmed to deceive.  All humans lie, it is part of our hard wired circuits.  The inner deception is detrimental when we deceive ourselves more than if we lie to others.

We lie to ourselves about our romantic relationships because we are afraid of being alone or that we may be unlovable.  We want so much for that new someone to be ‘the one’ that we go to great lengths to deceive ourselves that this new guy/girl is amazingly perfect and the ideal partner you have been manifesting.

Be honest with yourself.

When the person we have been dating for a while starts to show their real colors we become surprised like they were hiding it.  No one can hide who they are if you are really listening and paying attention.  You may be fooled for a short period of time but if you are present and not interposing what you want them to look or sound like you will start to see the truth really fast.

How do you lie to yourself about your relationships?  In what ways have you deceived yourself in the past?

Spiritual Power

Spiritual Power

Wait, what?”  It felt like I was waking up from a dream.  “You always make a fool of yourself when you are around those people. You know you are not smart, you should just keep your mouth shut!”  I state to myself. “Wait..”, I say.  “You are right, why do I do everything wrong?”

When you have an interior dialog that is constantly chattering away, you become so immune and complacent to it you do not realize what it is saying or what is happening.  You allow it to take over your thoughts and emotions and carry you into sadness or anger.

This is what the ego is hoping for. The ego wants you to give up your power to its words.  It is controlling and manipulative.

There are two types of power, spiritual power and ego power.  Ego power is about manipulation, it has an aggressive energy.  It is usually so loud and obnoxious that it overpowers the quieter spiritual power voice.

Have you become mesmerized by to egos voice thinking that it has all the power and holds all the cards?  Think about it for a moment.  Are you giving your power away to a part of you that is not nice, has too many negative things to say?  The ego holds you hostage either in the past story or in the fear of the future.

The ego likes stories of hurt and pain, either yours or others.  It does not matter if it makes up a story or it pretends that is a real story.  The ego has the ability to make itself the center of your subconscious attention.

Spiritual power has a quieter energy but once you are quiet enough to actually hear it, you recognize the immense power that it has.  This is why people who meditate have a type of quiet power, they are less likely to pay attention to the ego voice.

The ego is the shadow side of a fox, sly and sneaky.  The negative ego will sneak into your energy, thoughts and feelings when you are not looking.  It will infiltrate your life and before you know it you will start to manifest negative situations and experiences.

The ego will start to ask “why this is happening to me, I am a positive, good person and it must be bad luck or negative energy!”  It refuses to take responsibility for its experience which takes away all your power.   The ego feeds on fear.

One of the ways to ego gains power is to squelch spiritual power so the ego can dominate and control your experiences. It wants you to believe that the world with cars and computers is real and the subtle world of spiritual love, abundance and spiritual power is a lie.

I know I am making the ego out to be the ‘bad guy’ but it is just trying to survive so you can’t be upset about that.  This is exactly why it is important to understand the difference between spiritual power and ego power!  Ego is an infant in comparison to the soul.  In other words, we have to appreciate the egos desires without buying into its wants!  It is possible to quiet its unruly voice which helps you feel more powerful. (spiritual power)

You quiet the egos voice through meditation, mindfulness practice and just being aware that the ego is an infant and not to take it too seriously!

How do you distinguish between the ego’s power and Spiritual Power?

Never Again

Never Again

I have been a spiritual teacher, healer and intuitive reader for over 15 years and have been on the path of personal development since I was a teenager.  I have traveled to places unknown and met people unseen. I have searched for meaning, awareness and God knows what else!  I have chased the dream of enlightenment, ‘worked’ on myself and made sure I was not taking anything ‘personally’.  

I am so grateful to all my teachers, students, friends and everyone that has been on this journey with me, words can’t express the full gratitude my heart feels.

But, I am no longer going to strive, grasp, chase and wish for enlightenment.  I am no longer going to be looking for all the things I need to fix in myself or seek out healing so I may be a better me. I will, however, take full accountability for all I do and say without excuses (wait, shit that means I can’t even blame my ego, ‘sigh’).

I am going to commit to the awareness that I can be a better version than who I was a moment ago.  I am going to recognize my mistakes without needing to fix them.  I am already an enlightened being when my ego is not buying into the story of…

  1. Not being good enough for (fill in the blank and boy do I like to fill in the blank!!!!)
  2. They did that to me (ugh, this one is my victim ego that loves the joy ride of a great pity party)
  3. I am too afraid to (fill in the blank again, an oldie but a goody)
  4. I will wait until (ugh, another fill in the blank, I really need some new material)
  5. You did it again (yup, I said it again, felt it again, I did it again, whatever it was!)

I could do this all day but you get the gist.  I am not saying I have all the answers or that my ego is gone and I am now enlightened, follow me into the light.  That would be me playing into my ego’s need to make me better and for me to feel superior.  This all comes from a place of being able to witness others struggle between their higher consciousness (soul, higher self, higher voice, Christ self etc.) and their ego.  I see them becoming clear on what that Higher Consciousness feels and sounds like and watching the ego sabotage and deny it. 

I truly know that the higher states of consciousness are within all of us!!!  It is not ‘out there’ but right there!!  We do not listen or recognize it because our ego has so much to say about everything!  How are we going to feel the subtle energy of the Higher Consciousness if the ego is constantly drowning it out by repeating the list above all of our waking moments?

I will not chase getting better but I will become aware of the ego and Higher Consciousness and their role in my life.  That is what I help others with, becoming empowered and allowing their Higher Consciousness to be more present than the ego.

I would love to hear what you have to say about this and how it makes you feel.  Please comment below, I am so curious!

Passionate or Crazy?

Passionate or Crazy?

The emphasis on purpose has made many people crazy with self-doubt and feeling unfulfilled.  This creates an energy of stuckness which creates more self-doubt.
Are you on the hamster wheel self-doubt and stuckness?

If you feel unfulfilled and stuck it is time to re-flame your passions.  We spend too much time on mindless tasks that we are supposed to do and not on our passions.  As a mother of two who runs a business and takes care of everything in my home I still find time for my passion.

How do I have time for my passions?  I make the time!  


What you may not know is that passion is your purpose…

It’s your passion that fuels the excitement and motivation of your purpose!

Let’s say that purpose is not always your vocation or how you make money but it is about your passion.  What you love to do, what brings you joy and what fuels your soul that is what is really important in life.

  1. Someday…

I knew a woman who spoke about being on stage and singing all the time.  When you listened to her you would think that was her passion but in reality she was deathly afraid of singing in front of others and she still has not pursued singing.  If you focus on what you will never really do and think, ‘someday this will happen for me’ you are not living your purpose.  You will always feel unfulfilled and lack passion in life.

  1. Passion and Career

A friend recently told me she felt as if she did not do anything with her life because she never completed her ‘education’ nor does she have a ‘career’.   I asked her how she feels about kids of all ages and she lit up!

She said all she wanted to be is a mom and now she is a mother of four and a grandmother of two.  She still has a son in High School and another son in college.  She has worked as a substitute at the local schools for 25 years so she could be with her children and all the other children in the community.

To me it is obvious that she has lived her passion and purpose! A degree or career have nothing to do with purpose.  As a substitute teacher she has been a role model and influenced many children which means she has lived her passion and purpose.

  1. Just a Job?

Another person I know well has a great career and does well financially but his passion is hunting and fishing.  I would not say he loves his job but he seems content.  He becomes more alive and fueled once he has made the time to be out in nature so I see it as he is fueling his passion!

We all have to do things in our life we do not love or feel passionate about!  Just ask my kids what I would never feel passionate about… they will tell you cleaning.  🙂  Keeping my house clean, doing the grocery shopping and cooking are my jobs and I do them because I know that I am still fulfilling a purpose of a safe home for my children.

But later…I will be doing something I am really passionate about!!


Go do something today that brings you excitement and recharges your passion!

Third Eye Meditation

This video includes a short introduction to the third eye and a guided meditation that will open and activate your third eye.  This was done live on google hangout so the video quality is so so.

Please comment below if you enjoyed this video

In loving kindness


Consciously Dating

Dating? Then this is for you!