Episode 024: Learn to be the Love You Want to See in the World

Transcription

Melissa (00:40):

Hi, and welcome to this episode of Spiritual Expansion. And today I have a special guest! Super excited because not only is she intelligent, beautiful, amazing, super spiritual and grounded at the same time, but she is my bestie. Diane Hayworth is here. And today we're going to talk about her Be Love Principles. So I just want to go right in. We're going to dive right in. So Diane, curious, how do the Be Love Principles, how do they help people?

Diane (01:21):

I'm so glad you asked that and thank you again for giving me the opportunity to not only be with you, but to talk to these beautiful people that I know tune into the show all the time. So the Be Love Principles are simply a template that people can use to consistently feel more connected to their own inner divine wisdom. So for me, and you went through this with me, so you remember times where I have felt very frantic, overwhelmed, {and} stressed. I've just felt like, you know, the world is nuts. Just getting blown around in the wind. This has been a process. A template is what I call it. That helps ground me to the truth. To ground me to that presence of love that I am, that you are, that really helps me remember that, you know, the world as we experience it, is really a creation of our thoughts. And when we can come from that presence of love, our experience of the world changes.

Melissa (02:28):

That makes sense. That makes a lot of sense. When you're talking about that inner wisdom and that connection, is that the same as intuition or a part of intuition that you're talking about?

Diane (02:42):

The way that I look at it is that inner divine wisdom is that divine intelligence. That's part of what connects us right in the big oneness. And I know sometimes my clients will get a little confused by that, but man, if you pick up your phone and Google information and you get it at your fingertips, right? For us to remember that we have the ultimate seat of intelligence and information and guidance and wisdom right inside of us. And part of that absolutely is intuition. When you are connected to the heart space, as opposed to your ego or your personality. Yeah, I do think it's part of it.

Melissa (03:27):

Yeah, absolutely. So when you're working with people and we'll go into what the Be LovePrinciples are in a little bit, when you're working with people, what do you find that they receive through using these principles? How do their lives change?

Diane (03:48):

You know, the most amazing thing to me is any time anyone consciously tunes into that divine love, whether it's using the Be Love Principles or any other tool, but when they are consistently focused on tuning into love, they have greater clarity about who they are, what they're here to do, how they're here to be. They have greater confidence. I find that their levels of peace and happiness increase. And of course that connection to spirit, that understanding that they are part of something bigger than just themselves. And that's comforting. And not only is it comforting, it just really puts into perspective your unique purpose here in the world. And that is, man, there's nothing better than that.

Melissa (04:43):

No, and we all need to understand our unique purpose and it's not like a doing purpose. It's a being purpose.

Diane (04:49):

I think we all have the same purpose, but we live it out differently. Right? And at different times of our life, our purpose will be a little different.

Melissa (04:58):

Yeah. I love that. I love that a lot. So I know a little bit about the story, but can you share with everybody how you received this information?

Diane (05:11):

Yes. Cause I think that's really important because what can happen for me or you, can happen for everybody. This isn't anything that's just specific to one or two people, right? As you know, cause you and I have been together for what? Over 10 years now, as friends. I had been on my own spiritual path. I had been praying as part of my daily routine. “Show me how to serve, show me how to be an instrument of your peace.” I was really at the place where I wanted to be of service to anybody and anyone that I was being directed to. And I, quite frankly, I didn't exactly know what that looked like and what occurred was part of my daily practice. I also have a journaling practice and the very last entry in my journal every day is “Love, what do you most want me to know today?”

Diane (06:08):

And in that context, love to me is universe, source, God, whatever you think the intelligent, creative, expansive energy that creates galaxies is and beats your heart and mind. That's what I call love. So I happened to be in a workshop setting with my mentor, Dr. Robert Holden, and we were instructed to imagine we were on a foundation of love and to go into that sacred space of our own hearts and ask that question and see what happened. “Love, what do you most want me to know today?” And in this particular situation, I had what I call a full body direct download. I had a vision, I heard voices. I was given a process. And in response to that question, “Love, what do you most want me to know today?”, I heard “Be Love”. And in a vision, I was shown these four steps to be loved: Greet everyone with an open heart, without an agenda. See the divine essence in everyone. Forgive quickly, completely and unconditionally. And remember you never left the light. You never left the light of the all. And it was pretty dramatic. I don't usually get those full body experiences like that. And as you know, I even got sick afterwards. If anybody's interested in the full story, they can go to BeLovePrinciples.org. But yeah, it took me a while to wrap my head around what I was to do with that actually, and how to live that.

Melissa (07:59):

Yeah, because that is, it's a practice and it is in practice. When you have any practice, it's something that you have to live, like you said, and that's really important.

Diane (08:11):

And I think that when you get that, even when you know your heart is dedicated to serve others, you’ve got to get it first, right? You can't teach unless you know what it is. So I had to learn to understand and live those principles first, individually. I used like one a week and just started journaling about it. And what would it be like if I could greet everyone with an open heart without an agenda? It wasn't that easy. I kind of thought, oh yeah, this is cool. No, it was not that easy to greet everybody. I had to really expand my awareness and it helped me understand how many times I wasn't reading people with an open heart. And that agenda part to me, had to do with my preconceived notions, my judgements. Man, all that got blown away. And even eventually I realized who I really needed to greet with an open heart was myself. So I started doing that in a mirror. And you remember those frantic calls? Do you, my friend? When I was going through that. 

Melissa (09:20):

Well, you know, as you're talking about this, and I've done the Principles, so I've worked on them myself and you've helped me with them. So this is a practice that I use. As you were talking, what kind of came to me was these Principles help you understand the projections of the ego. I talk a lot on my podcast about dissolution of the ego. So this actual practice, these Be Love Principles, these can help you dissolve the ego because we're always projecting our stuff on everything into the world. But if you open your heart and you approach something with an open heart, without an agenda, or a person without that, with the open heart and without an agenda, that's going to help dissolve the ego.

Diane (10:17):

And the ego doesn't like it either, by the way. No, of course! It's going to resist that. It does not like it.

Melissa (10:23):

It's going to resist that. Yeah. So, tell me a little bit, maybe you can give us a little pointer of how to help the ego be dissolved through the process.

Diane (10:36):

Well, I can tell you what occurred for me and some of the folks that I've led through this process,  you know, I even ran a case study with a small group of people where they use this for three months consistently, the individual Principles and the whole set, as a process. And one of the things that I saw happen with the ego,  for myself and others, was that it was put in perspective. So people had a heightened awareness of when they were leading with the ego, as opposed to that heart centered place. They also were much more aware of the resistance and were able to question, “Well, wait a minute, where's that coming from? Why am I so resistant to this?” You know, I have people that really have a hard time looking in their own eyes in a mirror and just imagining that second one: See the divine essence  othiners.

Diane (11:34):

So right. You have to see it in yourself First. Now I work with lots of women who are beautiful, intelligent, brilliant women who are happy to see the divine essence in everyone else, but they have that ego perspective of, oh no, no, it's not me. You know, I'm not good enough. I'm not enough, whatever it is that their stuff is. And there is something about that truth of love that just shines a light in all of those dark places that we're afraid to go to by ourselves. And when we realize we're never by ourselves, we're always in that light of love. It helps. Yeah. It just helps with the perspective, I think, of the ego and what is the ego's place in the world. I teach my folks to live from their heart, to execute guidance right from their head if they are moved, or guided rather, to make a phone call. It's probably going to be their personality that picks up the phone and pushes the buttons. But to really make sure that you are, as much as you can be, living from that place of love and guidance. And what I found these principles help you to do is to stay on track, which doesn't mean you don't get on the ego off-ramp from spirit highway every once in a while. Because that happens. But then you can recognize it. It's so much easier to recognize, “Oh, wait a minute. I need to get back. I need to get back.” So that's, I think, the main thing. This has been such a powerful tool for awareness.

Melissa (13:15):

Yeah. That makes sense. That makes a lot of sense. And when you have that awareness and you're living from your heart more, what have you noticed people attracting that's different than what they were attracting before they were using the Be Love Principles?

Diane (13:32):

I can give you an example from this case study. Actually I had a lady, a case study I should say, was conducted in January through the end of March 2020. So this was really pre-pandemic. And then, oh my gosh, we're in the middle of it. Or in the beginning of it, rather, and we didn't really know what was going on. This particular woman was a healthcare professional who worked in an office setting. So they obviously were, you know, just in the thick of all this stuff that was going on. And at the beginning of the study, she would write to me. They actually had surveys that they completed every week so I could annotate this. She would just write about, you know, just how horrible these people were [that] she worked with. And, you know, they were just dumb and they didn't get things and they were terrible to work with and just all this stuff.

Diane (14:26):

And after she had been working with the Principles for maybe two months, I got this note that said, “I don't know how everybody turned around, but dag gone, if these aren’t the best women I've ever worked with!” Now, obviously nobody was doing work that we were aware of but her, so it changed her entire perspective and therefore her experience, and these women who were so horrific to work with just two months before, suddenly became angels. So her life became more peaceful, more settled, more happy. She looked forward to going to work at the beginning of a pandemic. I mean, that seems weird. And because she was in such a better place, her marriage was better. The relationship with her kids was better. Her family relationships improved. Yeah, it was miraculous, actually, what occurred, because she chose to keep coming as best she could using this tool from a place of love instead of fear and ego.

Melissa (15:30):

That makes a lot of sense. Do you think that this, The Be Principles, also calls in things? Now I'm going to say this loosely, I'm not a big Law of Attraction kind of person, but I do believe in what you put out there. You know, you experience, not what you get back, but what you experience in your life. So do you think these Principles give you that?  Do different things start to attract to you or come into your perspective? 

Diane (16:06):

Yeah, they absolutely do.  They have for myself, they have for my clients and my students, and it just makes sense. Even in the example I just gave. All she saw in her office setting was she was disillusioned. She saw chaos, she saw mismanagement. That's what she saw. That's what she fed into. And that's what she looked for. Right? Cause if that's your experience, that's what, you know, every day, no matter what happens, you're going to look for more of that. As she shifted her perspective to not only how she could greet things with an open heart, but how she could see the divine essence in herself and in others and in situations. And a big part of the Principles is the forgiveness piece. Once she could do that. And that last piece, remember “You never left the light.” When you can start to see yourself as a light being, as that beautiful spark of the divine, having a human experience, then it absolutely changes the way you see everything around you. Actually in my case study, I saw people make tremendous improvements even in their physical health, just from the way they were looking at things. That was amazing to me.

Melissa (17:36):

So they're attracting not just their perspective, but they're also attracting positive things and experiences in their life, is what you're saying.

Diane (17:46):

I'm saying you find whatever you look for. You know, if you're looking for angels, you find angels. If you're looking for devils, you'll find them, right? You'll find it. And your wisdom. That makes a lot of sense.

Melissa (18:07):

So I'm gonna switch up the gears, just a hair,  because I know you're really into the mystics and being a mystic. And I want to know a little bit more about that.

Diane (18:23):

You know, I appreciate that question because a lot of people, I think, believe to be a mystic. First of all, you gotta be a spiritual dude, that's dead. Like that's what the mystics are. And that is not my definition of a mystic. A mystic to me is anyone who lives from a direct experience with the divine. That's it, you're a mystic, I'm a mystic. Anyone who seeks a direct experience with the divine is having a mystic experience. Somebody that you and I have talked about from history that we both love is St. Francis. What a beautiful  expression of what they call a ‘nature mystic’, right? He would talk about, you know, Sister Rabbit and Brother Squirrel. He saw the divine reflected in everything, every blade of grass, in the wind, in every person he encountered. That's a mystic and we can do the same things. And the Be Love Principles had helped me understand that, especially that one about just seeing the divine essence in everyone and everything. Even in situations where, quite frankly, and especially over the last few years, I did not think there was any divine anywhere.  You know, I have been able to move past that. And even when I don't understand a situation, it doesn’t mean I can't trust the divine is at work somewhere.

Melissa (19:56):

Nice. Okay. That makes sense. So how do you help people walk along their own mystic path? I guess that's the way I'm hearing it.

Diane (20:07):

They just need to remember to consciously connect to their own inner divine wisdom, which you and I talk about is that heart-centered place. And after a while, as you certainly know, it just becomes a way of life, right? But if you have been brought up traditionally, particularly in Western culture where you've been taught that everything you're supposed to respect and react to is outside of you, then it takes a little bit to just remember, right, to go inside and let this be the guide of your life. And it just takes practice and being consistent, lots of ways to do that. I always start people off with meditation.  I just think that is a beautiful way. And we know it works not only spiritually, but we know how it works from a biological perspective. It just helps you quiet those voices in your head, the what ifs, you're not good enough, daddy said to do this… whatever's going on in there. That may be your human experience. That doesn't mean that’s your truth. It certainly wasn't mine. So the main thing I do is help people connect to their inner divine wisdom. And the Be Love Principles is one way I do that.

Melissa (21:21):

Yes. And they learn to not only guide themselves and their lives, but they change their perspective by using these Principles. So we actually have to talk about what the Principles are.  But I really wanted people to understand that this is a very divine way of approaching their lives that can help their ego, that can help their intuition, that can help them also develop an inner knowingness and their own inner mystic. So why don't you tell us exactly what the Principles are?

Diane (22:02):

They're four. And we had mentioned them before, but they are so simple. And I think that's one thing that trips people up. It's like, why are they so simple? Because love is simple. It's not complex. And that's where this comes from. First Principle is: Greet everyone with an open heart without an agenda.

Melissa (22:24):

And what does that mean? How could somebody practice that?

Diane (22:30):

So what I have people do is, literally, at first, put their hand on their heart, imagine they are breathing in and out of their heart, which gets them out of their head. Right? And I am a big one to not overthink this. I go into what I call that sacred space of my own heart. And I teach my clients to do this and say, “Show me how to greet everyone with an open heart, without an agenda.” That's one of the things I do every morning actually. I pray the Principals as a process. And I am going inside and saying, “Show me what this means for me today, in my life today.” 

Melissa (23:13):

So you're not just saying the Principles, you're embodying that.

Diane (23:18):

I'm embodying them. I have a heightened awareness of them. I am reciting them. I have them all over the place. So if I'm going to meet someone new, how do I greet them with an open heart, without an agenda? I've noticed that, for me, things, people, places, or situations that would trigger me in the past, they just don't now. And I think that is a situation where my ego has taken a back seat because, for me, when I would be triggered, I'd feel resentful. I'd feel someone had disrespected me, whatever it was, right? That's what a trigger.. or I was afraid for whatever reason, it just doesn't occur because I'm not bringing that idea that I need to be protected to anyone.  It's much easier for me to meet people, soul to soul, but to be brutally honest, I can recognize someone as a divine soul and maybe their personality doesn't click with mine, but it doesn't mean I can't recognize them as the divine essence that they are, which is Principle.

Diane (24:32):

number two: Recognize the divine essence. See the divine essence in everyone and everything. And I actually see an iridescent light in people and I can see, and anybody can do that that practices, their human actions separate from who they are as a divine being. When I can greet people with an open heart, without an agenda, that first Principle, I can ask to see their divine essence, even when things don't go the way I think that they could have or should have, maybe. That makes it much easier for Principle three, which is: Forgive quickly, completely and unconditionally. If I can see someone's actions as separate from who they are as a divine being, it's easier to forgive them and to forgive myself, if I need to. I know that forgiveness can be kind of a tricky subject in our human world. If someone has done something and there are legal consequences, take whatever action legally somebody needs to do.

Diane (25:46):

What I do is just take my guidance from my heart, right? So if I'm guided to take some kind of action, then I'll do that. But it's coming from love, not ego, retribution, guilt, shame, resentment. That's a big difference in that. So what I find is so miraculous about this process is that if you use them as a template, then by the time you're getting to the forgiveness piece, already your heart has opened and your ego has taken a little bit of a backseat, which to me makes it much easier. If you can go through that, then that fourth Principle is: Remember you never left the light. You never left the light of the all. We are all one in this beautiful energy of love. It's just like when you go to the beach, you can see a wave come up and there might be a couple drops that end up on the shore.

Diane (26:52):

That's the little individual expression of the ocean, but they roll back and they're really one with that ocean. We're one with that one energy. And the more we remember that, to me, this, what I really love about this process is that, first of all, it is simple. Doesn't mean it's easy till you get the hang of it, but it is simple. And if we could all see the divine essence in each other, if we could forgive when we needed to, if we remembered we never left the light of the all, we couldn't help but treat each other with respect and love. We couldn't help but treat the earth and animals and everything would have a different perspective. And we would be coming from a foundation of love. And isn't that what we're trying to do as we're creating this new earth?

Melissa (27:49):

Yes. So I appreciate you giving some clear understanding of each Principle and how to use them in your daily life. That way, everybody can have that understanding. What is it about your whole awakening that you've gone through your whole life? What do you think happened that brought you to this moment with the Be Love Principles, this whole experience and download?

Diane (28:24):

Well, first of all, I think it was consistently showing up for love and consistently asking how. “Love, what do you most want me to know today?” Consistent meditation, consistently studying the mystics and being drawn to that which is greater than any of us as individuals and understanding we're all part of it. So there isn't anything that you do, that I do that anybody else can't do. That's one of the main things I want to make sure people understand. Love is available to everybody. It's already what you are. It's just, are you asking, are you tapping into that? For me, I really have to say, probably throughout my life, I did not feel loved, treasured or adored by the people in my family necessarily, or the people that I had romantic relationships with. And for me it was just, I know there's love. Where is it? Cause I'm not finding it out here. And I eventually realized that this external reflection, it's just only a reflection of the love that you recognize and feel for yourself.

Melissa (29:47):

Wow. I think that's what it was. Yeah, that's pretty profound. Yeah. Cause you've been on this journey a long time, but I really feel like you really do embody these Principles and it is a practice and no one's perfect. And we don't ever assume that about anybody. Nope. But when you embody this, what I recognized is that you want to share these Principles because you know the depth of them and how they can help people. But like you said, they're so simple, but the practice is deep and that's why when you just read the Principles, you think, okay, that sounds great. But the depth that you help people understand themselves, how they interact with the world, that's a totally different experience. So what else can you share with everyone to help them understand the depth of these Principles?

Diane (30:54):

Well, there's a couple things.  We'd mentioned that website. I know I've got some information on there that will help people. But experiment, play with these,these are  dynamic, they're flexible, they're fluid. And what I found with myself and my students and clients is that there isn't anything they don't apply to. So whether it's a romantic relationship, whether it's an issue you've got at work, whether it's a mindset that you recognize is not healthy for you, about …could be anything, a political organization or anything like that. These applied consistently just help you find that higher truth. What I did at first was I took one Principle a week and just said, well, show me what would it be like to forgive everybody for a week. Again, that wasn't my easiest week I've ever had, but it's through the application, right?

Diane (31:58):

And the thing about the guides that I give you, or you can find other places, do what you're guided to do and trust that inner guidance. Connect with your heart. You and I know, Melissa, that I'm always having people breathe. Imagine they're breathing love in, through the back of their heart and out through the front, just to ground you in that real source of power, intelligence, and truth that you have. We're just not used to it. We're just not used to it. So practicing them with other people and practicing them with yourself. Practicing them with yourself. You can journal about them. You can practice in the mirror. You can just, I even have people sometimes set alarms on their phone, just set an alarm on their phone. So they remember throughout the day, “Oh, wait a minute.

Diane (32:53):

What could I open my heart to right now? Who's coming up for me?” Whether it's somebody in a video they're seeing, a podcast they're listening to, somebody they're seeing at the grocery store, just helps keep that awareness at the forefront of their mind. Cause that's all this is. The more you ask to be connected and to be the love that we're here to be, the more that it unfolds for you. You know, everybody knows that quote, right? “You've got to be the change you want to see in the world.” And to me, I want to see more love in the world. I want to see more love in my life and your life and our friends' lives. I want to see more love in our communities. I want to see more love in our politics. And it really does start with each one of us waking up to that power that we have, that for many of us has just been asleep and it's time to wake up. It's time for us all to wake up.

Melissa (33:55):

Yeah. And if we come from love, then we're coming more from what you say is the divine. And when we come from the divine, then we are embodying that energy of love and divineness. And we can recognize it within ourselves. And I think that's where a lot of people get tripped up, they don't recognize it within themselves. So it's hard for them to recognize it in anyone else

Diane (34:21):

It's impossible. You're right. I also think another thing that trips people up is the idea about love. Like, okay, well that's all sweet and soft. No, it's really not. Especially in Western cultures, we have so many misconceptions about love, because look at the way that we use it. Right. I love my children. I love my fuzzy slippers. I love this flavor of gelato. Okay. Those are not any of the love I'm talking about. That's love as it pertains to attachment. We're talking about the intelligent, creative, expansive energy of love. And there is nothing soft about an energy that creates galaxies that can mastermind these beautiful human bodies and the intricacies of our environment. Just look at any square foot of land on the planet and how intricately everything works with each other. That's amazing. That's the energy. That's the intelligence that each of us has access to, that we actually are. We just have to remember.

Melissa (35:39):

I agree. I agree.  So is there anything else you want to share with everyone?

Diane (35:47):

Well, first of all, just how excited I am to be here and how much I appreciate this and how much I love you and respect you and your work. And I see the wonderful shifts that people make when they follow you in your work. And that to me is just a beautiful type of service. This is simply another tool that people can use to find greater peace, greater clarity, greater confidence, greater connection. And there's no time table. Everybody's going to get there eventually, but I would encourage everybody to hop aboard now because each one of our communities, wherever you are in the world, when you hear this, our communities, our families, they need us to be that beacon of light to remind ourselves and each other about the power of love. And this is one way for us to do that. One way for us to do that. Right.

Melissa (36:54):

Great.  do you have a free gift that you want to share with everyone?

Diane (36:58):

I do. I've got a little, a workbook and a meditation and I guess that'll be in the show notes. Yes. Yeah. And it actually gives you some simple exercises. They're very doable and they, I think part of the power is just in the simplicity of them and just increasing your awareness. So I would be delighted to share that with everybody and really encourage them to check it out and check out the website.  Yeah, there's lots of interviews and just lots of tips and things there. So there's even my song

Melissa (37:36):

And your song. Oh my gosh. This song is awesome. So BeLovePrinciples.org. Yup. BeLovePrinciples.org and that will also be down in the show notes. So thank you so much, Diane. I appreciate it. For everyone. who's listening, please subscribe and share this with your friends. Send you all love. I'll see you all next week. Bye-bye.