Episode 016: Tools to Transcend Your Addictions Using Ascension Work

Transcription

In this episode, I'm going to share an interview I did with my good friend, Matt Finch, and Matt is a recovery coach. He is phenomenal with the work that he does, and the reason I wanted to share this is because we all have our addiction issues. We can be addicted to TV. We can be addicted to food, other substances, illegal drugs, and even we've can be addicting. If it's something that you feel that you have to have all the time and it's up to you, what you want to do with your addictions.

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So if you have a sugar addiction, if you want to hold onto it for a while, that's cool. But the information that we share, both Matt and I in this interview is really special because I feel that it's giving people tools to help them in their life, to transcend and transmute all sorts of different things. We talk about mental loops. We talk about addiction to media. So enjoy this episode. And if you love it, please subscribe and leave a review. Sending you love light, light love. Before you reach for your phone, make an intention. What is my intention for the day? I intend to have great relationships. I intend to flow through my day. I intend to see the beauty and grace in my day. I intend to whatever, even before I get out of bed in that moment and meditate and do my exercise. I go into my heart and I sit there and I say, my intention is to be fully present with an open heart, to love boldly and serve wisely. And I wait for my heart to be so open. And then I do one or two things, and then I go meditate.

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Melissa is the founder of spiritual expansion Academy. She's also an essential teacher, healer coach speaker, and an advanced, intuitive Melissa's passion is essential and expanding the consciousness of the planet by supporting the spiritual community. She has an open channel to the Ascension frequencies and sacred light codes and loves to share that wisdom with you. All of Melissa's current classes are online, including an Akashic record certification and an Ascension light code activation class, her book, or radical approach to the Akashic records, master your life and raise your vibration is consistently a number one, Amazon bestseller. I myself read that as soon as it came out the ebook and gave it a five star review, it was sensational. Uh, Melissa has been studying metaphysics for most of her life, and she's been teaching metaphysical classes for more than 20 years and has been an intuitive reader for over 22 years. Melissa's certifications and trainings include a BS in psychology angel therapy practitioner certified through Doreen virtue, the reconnection theta healing practitioner and instructor, feta healing, intuitive anatomy practitioner, and instructor reference point therapy and practitioner and instructor, rapid personal transformation practitioner and instructor, a shocker healing and balancing certified intuitive counselor, Reiki, master intuitive coaching and energy healing, mystery school graduate. She is a wealth of information, both with a spiritual and metaphysical and also scientific quantum physics, psychology philosophy, and much for this. This was a really fun interview and talk with her.

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I'm excited to present it to you and let's get started, took a long time to get to this place. So boy, what I found is that the opioid and other addictions were probably the easiest part. It was the thinking that

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The healing your past, because it wasn't like you were addicted. And then you had issues. You had issues which made you more prone to it.

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Exactly. And then after I quit, I quit my addiction while I was going to school to be a, become a certified substance abuse counselor. And so I started interning at a opioid treatment program, outpatient one only six months after I was off of drugs and alcohol only six months off. And here I am starting to help all these other people. And I did that for years and years, just learning how I could help these people practicing, helping, and I didn't work on any of my stuff until a relationship came. And then all of a sudden everything cause before it was just, you know, I could be, I could be narcissistic. I could be a workaholic. I could be this or that, but in a relationship, it was me and someone else. And she wasn't putting up with that. And she had a lot of emotional and psychological and trauma things too.

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So we just, and that, that relationship was like, what probably put me on a new life path even more so than maybe not more so than the addiction, but I want to start talking about some of the notes I took from one of your podcast episodes. And this is I'm very interested in this stuff. You said. So energy shifts like codes, more conducive to bring you into unity consciousness, 2020, moving from lower Shakur energies to heart slow gradual process from 2020 to 2030, we're just hitting the precipice of the Ascension process. We are in a state of perpetual shift and change. The only way for you to stay in your heart energy is to be more present in the moment and then recognize how your inner process is a reflection of your world. Everything that you create around you. So I want you to talk about that site type of stuff, because a lot of people are confused. You go on to the news networks or YouTube or social media, and there's just seems like all craziness going on. So that's what I really wanted to get you on because your perspective on this is the one that I like to listen to rather than a bunch of other bozos talking.

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Right? Right. Yeah. And it's hard for a lot of people because they get caught up in the fear that is there in those other forms of media. And what's the best way to control people fear. And when we're in a lot of fear, we put ourselves in a place of being more of a follower than a leader. So we don't even leave our own lives. We're just following what everybody else wants us to do instead of leading our own lives and leading from ourselves from our own heart, we're saying, okay, that person knows something. So I'm just going to follow them and follow them. And a lot of people who do have addictions, probably part of their problem, isn't just the addiction itself. It's the trust in themselves feeling like they are good enough or that they can do it. And when they feel that way, it's easier for them to follow than to make their own choices and decisions.

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It seems like a lot of people are outsourcing their truth even, or kind of outsourcing more than they need to. And that fear that you've said that is the best way to control people and addiction for a lot of people is just perpetual fear and fight or flight. Melissa. I gotta probably honestly say that. I think it was only in this last year, perhaps that I feel like I finally started to live predominantly in the heart and the present moment versus addicted to thinking about the future and trying to predict and worrying. I was a big worrier and resisting what is, and being attached to certain things. And so nowadays I'm just like driving around my car and in traffic and I used to get off and I'm like, Oh, this is, you know, just enjoying the present moment. I can do that better because of a few things.

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Number one, biochemical optimization, taking care of your health, but also number two, what you were talking about, recognize how your inner process is a reflection of your world. And we create our worlds through that inner process. And for years I was just looking outside at me, Oh, this thing right here, this seminar, this supplement or this person, and now I just look within, and sometimes it's really hard. Um, the last in December, there was some full moon or eclipse or new moon. I'm not sure what it was, but I remember for like a day and a half, just feeling like I wasn't depressed, but I was melancholic and I felt stuff stirring up. And so there's been a lot of different energies and some people have dealt with it. Good. Some people have dealt with it bad. Um, what, what do you recommend for people to kind of break those habits?

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Like for instance, when someone has so much momentum at being fearful at living from those basic survival, shocker energies think worrying and, and thinking that there's not enough money and there's not enough freedom, yada, yada, yada, if people have a lot of momentum going in that direction, what is one or two things they could do, they could take notes on this episode and go, okay, what can I start? Is it meditate in the morning with your divine love meditation? Which I love? Is it, what are some things people could do? Because that's what I found. It was hard. I'd get a little bit of progress and I'd fall back when I get a little progress. And so it took just consistent success and the progress was not linear, but now I've come to a spot where there's so much momentum and there's so much repetition of that, that I think now I've got a new personality. I'm way more chill. I'm way more go with the flow. I was such an in the past. I was so impatient. So that's a lot of that's because of your coaching and helping me for all those months. A few years ago.

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Yeah. Yeah. Well, I, I commend that you've done so much work on yourselves and that you didn't hold back, that when things weren't working, you were looking for something to change you, but nothing outside can change. And that's what I want everybody to understand is that you can't look outside of yourself for the next thing that will change you. A person can't make you feel love a situation can't make you feel worthy. It has to be within. And that's difficult because we are trained by our family, by society, by all sorts of institutions that something outside of yourself will make you feel better about you. If you have the right car, if you have the right girlfriend or boyfriend, if you have the right job, or if you're off these meds and then we want you off those beds, but we'll put you on these new meds, you know, everything outside of ourselves to make us better, but nothing outside of us can really make us better.

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It's situational. So I always call that situational happiness. Oh, I'm so happy to see you, Matthew. I'm so excited that you're here. That's a situation. Joy can only come from within and it's difficult because you, we weren't trained to feel in our joy. We weren't trained to look inside for what is really, you know, who we really are and what makes us happy. We're trained to be what a minion to everyone else's stuff. And the minion part of us is also trained through trauma. And unfortunately way too many people have had major traumas in their life. As someone who has an addiction issue, most likely they had a lot of trauma in childhood. And because of that trauma, it created this need to feel something. And then they didn't want to feel something. So they had to numb out and you know, that's part of it.

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So what you have to do is kind of retrain yourself and you have to start calling. I am not going to let those people take my life over anymore. Whether it's somebody from 30 years ago or from two years ago, it doesn't matter. And you have to start taking your power back from them. And the way to do that is to yes. Go in and ask yourself, is that fear real? Most people's fear is something, an old trauma from the subconscious mind. So it's an old fear. It's not a new fear. It's an old fear. And what happens is people think that they're unsafe in this moment, but 99% of the time I'll ask them, are you on safe right now? Or do you have a literal threat to your life? And most people will say, no, I don't. I don't have a threat.

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You know, nobody's coming after me with a knife, anything, but you know, when I was six, yes I did. But we're living from that six year old self. So you have to start asking yourself, is that fear real in the moment that will help. The other part is opening up your heart, which is hard for people. And that's why I actually created the divine love meditation for people to utilize that heart spaced wisdom. Um, and people want us to sustain fear. It's better for them. It's better for society. It's better for institutions. And it's better for, you know, all sorts of political institution. I'm talking, you know, corporations, um, medical community, uh, COVID everything. If we're in fear, then we are controllable one way or empowered. We're not so controllable. And they don't like that. And look, most addicts. The one thing about them is they do have a rebellious spirit about them.

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And that's what I love. Like I'm a, I'm a rebel in a lot of ways. Um, you would look at me and you think, where do you worry about I rebel against society all the time? Because my way of thinking is not what most people want you to think. And I'm very rebellious with that. But I also have a lot of compassion because we are rebellious because we can't help, but see that something doesn't compute how that person treated me at four years old from, from the age of four to 16, that doesn't compute in my mind and I need to rebel against it. So we try to pull away from that. So we're actually rebelling against our own personal selves, sometimes chip because we're, we were trained to be the victim. And that's an issue for a lot of people where we've been trained. It's easier for, for them to make us a victim because then we're not empowered. Does that make sense?

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Makes sense to a former 24 seven victim, remember me talking during our coaching sessions. Oh, and she did this and this is this. And you must have just been like, Oh, this guy has a lot of work.

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No, I would. But I would pull you back in and say, you know, you can choose that. And it is a choice, but you have to be consistently present. And that's hard. Matthew, come on. It's really hard for us to be present all the time. And why do, why do people go into substances to help us feel more addicted? It numbs us out. It makes us not have to feel the pain and sorrow and difficulties that we felt. And it's not easy. It's

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Not it's. And then when you come off of drugs, all those emotions come flooding out. So hard core. So what go, what you stuffed down with substances eventually comes up. Whether it's six months, a year or in my situation, it was many years before it all started to really come up and come out. And you know, at the beginning I was just on this. Wow, I'm doing so good. And I was kind of addicted to the fast successes that I was getting, uh, in life and in business. And I was addicted to, to the positive reinforcement. I was getting, uh, people on Facebook. It was all just so ego. And now I wasn't on Facebook for about three and a half months. And now I went back on just to be a part of this one, uh, recovery group, just to be an admin and go on there a couple of times a week.

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But since doing that since really just most of the day, there's not a bunch of information before I had my ear buds and always listening to audibles, always listening to pod. And now I just, Oh, I'll read for a half hour or maybe I'll watch a video or two, or listen to one of your podcasts, but it's a much lower information diet. And now I just get to enjoy more, more time to actually do fun things before it was this addicted to growth and success, because I felt so undeserving and I've still had low self-esteem even years after quitting drugs. And so that was, uh, a compensation to try and feel good about. Now. It's like, so I love aging because if you grow while you age, then life should start getting better and better. That's what I've found. 41 favorite year ever. Halloween.

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Yay. I'm so excited to hear that. Yeah. So there's a few things in there. First of all, those emotions that we stuffed down, they're still there. They're still sitting under there and we react. So even though you may not have felt them or know what they felt like you were reacting and your life. And even if you didn't know what those emotions were, you were still experiencing them through some sort of reaction when you got sober. And then the other part is I actually am really, I have a very clear awareness of what content I consume. And, and I'll give you a short little story around that. My son, who is 24 now, he said to me, you know, mom, for so long, I didn't understand why you had never watched the news. Everybody watched the news. I already knew they all have already. And he goes, now I get it.

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Now at 24, I get it because there's nothing, it doesn't feed anything inside of you. All. It feeds fear. It feeds control, and it feeds the ability to not be sovereign beings. And that means that I know what's right and wrong. And what's truthful. What they're trying to feed us is their truth, including conspiracy theories, including, you know, no matter what news channel you listen to, no matter who you listen to. So personally, totally. I only look for things that open the energy up for me, positivity. And I actually think that's where we are heading because all this fear, negative based energy, that the old way. So if you want to be like your grandpa and only follow what everybody else tells you to do, if you want to be like your parents and you know, be part of this political party or this belief system, then go for it.

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But if you want to get out the old mold into the new mold, you want to start deciding what content do I want to consume, because we do want to grow as humans. But knowing about everybody's idea about a person or how, you know, I, I'm sorry, so bad with, um, celebrities, but like how Brad Pitt who's he's dating now or what he's doing. I've no idea, but you know, if you're interested in that, then you're only looking outside of yourself, uh, consume content. That's actually gonna make you feel better inside knowing if Brad Pitt's doing whatever does that make you feel good? Does that make you feel excited, positive, ready to take on the day differently? No. So what you're consuming, I mean, think about this. When you move past an addiction, a lot of people, what they do is they replace that old addiction with a new addiction.

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And like you replaced your addiction. I've seen it time and time again with people and I get it. Um, but what happens is they're also so decide, what am I consuming through my body? You know, through my message, emotional state, through TV, through videos or podcasts, what am I consuming? Am I consuming things that are dark movies, video games? I mean, a lot of that stuff is negative on purpose. And I hate to say that it's negative on purpose because the energy that wants to consume you wants to consume you in negative light and you have a choice to go that direction or not. And I don't need to be negative about it. I want to encourage people, even if you love like video games that are a little wonky, okay. Play that for a little while and then play some Madden or, or listen to a positive podcast. So it doesn't mean that you have to like go cold Turkey

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More. I see what you're saying. And I lived what you're saying. And it is very common when I got off all the hard drugs and substances, like I said, then it was workaholism mixed with caffeine addiction. Then it was codependency and literally a person addiction. And she had a personal addiction to me. Then it was food addictions and more, and then it was more workaholism and caffeine. Um, I, I don't, I'm not addicted to anything right now. And it feels really good for the first time. It only took nine years of going from addiction to, and there was phases in there where I wasn't addicted to anything, but it is very common. It's, it's so crazy how the human brain is so avoiding of pain that will just do crazy things to avoid that temporary, that, to avoid feeling those emotions like poison ourselves with too much alcohol or taking way too many pharmaceutical drugs to get rid of that.

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And what you're saying is when we are more present and when we, instead of just going day to day and reaction on our regular habits of consuming too much news and too much TV in general for most of Americans, but to really access your prefrontal cortex to zone in on the beginning of the present moment. And then I noticed when I'm doing that, which is throughout the most of the day, I'm pretty darn present. Um, I used to be really unorganized and now I'm super organized. Thanks to Ashley. She set up this whole office area and everything's minimal and organized. So now that I'm organized, I'm able to just not be scatterbrained nearly as much. But when I do that, when I'm present and going through the day, then I can make better ease, much better decisions because back in the life of going from addiction to addiction, I wasn't thinking about this stuff too much.

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It was just like, go, go, go, go, go, right. No time to pause and inner reflect and all that. I was just chugging caffeine at work, and I'm doing this and doing that. It was nuts. So when people are more present, then you can make decisions better. Like, wait a second. I don't really need another cup of coffee. I actually feel pretty good. It's just a habit when I start feeling load. And so that mindfulness, that break between when you get an urge to do, uh, an unhealthy bad habit. And then all of a sudden when you've got that emotional kind of you're tapped into and you go, wait a second, that's just a little urge. That's going to go away in a minute. All right. A lot of people don't have that. I didn't have that for ages. And now that I have that, I'm like, so this is what it feels like to be like a lot of other people, I didn't have that.

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Um, and addiction shuts that down. It shuts down that disables, the prefrontal cortex hijacks, the survival midbrain. So yeah, it makes it difficult to do those things. But even when people are drinking and doing their own drugs, you can still meditate and do these inner processes even when you're on drugs. And that's what I think a lot of people don't realize. And I didn't realize it until maybe a year or two ago that you can actually get really, really healthy while you're still taking certain drugs. Probably not if you're taking methamphetamine every single day, but for people that are prescribed opioids or for people taking the very popular natural opioid crate and where for people even drinking, you can actually get your together. Pretty good. Even while you're still doing those behaviors. And then I find that when people do this and they just naturally, they start using less and then it just naturally tapers off. And that's what I'm trying to teach people and coach people to do nowadays, because it just seems like such a more intelligent and kind of [inaudible] high efficacy way of doing it for the people that are ready for that.

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Yeah. I agree with you. And also, you know, what took you nine years may take another person a year because they're, they're dedicated to the self-growth. I mean, look, why do we become addicted? We become addicted because we are hiding from something, whatever it is. It's not just emotions. It's from ourselves, from our traumas, from our pain, from our hurt. So why not look at that? And I think that's a great way. I agree with you because sometimes trying to shift in addiction with everything else that people are trying to do can be overwhelming for them. And you know, it's good to start one thing after another, after another, and maybe take down, you know, start doing a step down with whatever you're addicted to and in our personal work with that. And then you have more and availability of changing. And the other thing that I'm hearing that I feel is really important as you it's okay for you to change.

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And it's okay for you to make these major shifts. A lot of people, their family want them to be addicted. Their family wants them to be victims because if they're a victim and addicted, then they're part of the tribe. Then they're, you know, well, we know we can fix you, Matthew, if you keep on coming back with more problems, then I'm, then I'm worthy because I'm fixing you, but no one can fix you. And you have to say, wait a minute, I'm going take my power back. I'm not going to give my power away to anyone and take some self time to self reflect. What is it that you're giving your power away to? It's not just the drugs, it's the people around you. It's the media, it's your anger. You give your power away to there. The other question you can start asking yourself of self-inquiry is where do I allow myself to get away with things?

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You know, where am I bullshitting myself? You know, and ask yourself, where do I be asked myself? Because we love to deceive ourselves. We're great at deceiving other people. But when you deceive yourself, you're doing yourself, such a it's it's, uh, it's actually damaging yourself when you lie to yourself. So ask yourself, where do I lie to myself? Where am I deceiving myself? Maybe I'm deceiving myself saying, you know, it's okay to keep that person in my life. Even though they're still addicted and they trigger my need for my, the substance that I'm addicted to, but I'm going to keep them in my life. Because if I let them go, then what, that's a lie that you tell yourself, or I'll keep that cigarette in that little container, just in case someday, you're lying to yourself. You know, do you see where I'm going with that?

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Yeah. And along with the lying to yourself, also, people have behavioral, blind spots too, where people that know them and are around them can see it, but they're just like, huh? Uh, I had a lot of behavioral blind spots and, but this is all such great stuff. I'm like thinking where I want to go next. Oh yeah. And I want to dovetail on not only are people can see a lot of people consuming too much content that's negative. That's not making them feel good. But as far as consummation, we can consume videos and articles and podcasts and books. We can consume foods, beverages, oxygen, we can consume the smells. We can consume the touches. And that's one of the things that's helped me a bunch. My co-host Chris Scott and I were doing a podcast maybe two months ago. And he said that as new Monday routine, because even he used to work in finance for years and it was real stressful and he was an alcoholic.

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It was crazy. So still to this day, he's got some residual, um, you could call it probably residual trauma, even to where on Mondays, he still gets, he wakes up and has, you know, kind of feels a little bit stressed out just a little bit when he first wakes up because of the normal Monday grind, that was just a few years ago. So, well, that was like six years ago now. But anyways, he started to drive to the beach and Savannah Georgia, a 45 minute drive each way and go for a barefoot walk on the beach. That's what we do together. When he visits me here. And I'm like, Oh, I haven't been to the beach in so many months. And I live a mile away. So for like 15 days or so in a row, I think I missed one day or I think I might've missed two days, but I know I missed one day, about two weeks in a row.

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I went down to the beach every single day for a half hour to up to two hours barefoot. Most of the time I didn't bring my phone a couple of times that had called coaching calls. But I was focusing on feeling the sand in my bare feet, feeling the ocean water and my bare feet feeling, the wind, hearing the birds and the sounds, feeling the ocean spray, smelling the seaweed and the salt water. I did not use to do that stuff. I will. I did when, you know, when I was doing lots of cheek gong and learning about that stuff, I did a lot of that. So now I'm back into that and that's my personality. I'm back to playing music and stuff too. Like I stopped doing all this stuff and now I'm doing what I need that creative outlet with music. I need that nature full immersion, at least a few days a week.

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And so I've started to consume stuff that makes me feel good versus, and of course I'll still eat some crappy foods here and there and watch some crappy stuff here and there. But mostly that's just a little bit, you know, it's like in, um, Buddhist psychology, there's addiction is one extreme. And then when I ended the substance addiction, I did a bunch of other extremes, just go big and work, go big and all this. So now I'm starting to find an, even take that middle way of moderation to where things aren't so extreme. And when I noticed myself getting like, kind of obsessive about something, and then I have to just pull back, cause I know where that all goes.

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Right? Right. Well, so what happens is that, um, your, your brain, because you did have take so many different substances, your brain got addicted to the high, right? So now those substances are no longer giving you that high. What's going to give you your next high overworking relationships where everybody's yelling at each other, because those are stimulating you. And now the reason that you feel differently is because you're no longer needing that, that addictive high. And

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Guys from kissing, kissing, hugging, petting my bird. So it's a client not to cut you off and we'll get back. But a client texted me yesterday saying she was listening to one of our podcast episodes about natural highs while she was cleaning out her closet and found some old VHS tapes and cassette tapes. And she said, that gave her a dopamine boost. This is now a year after she quit opioids. And we worked together and then I helped her get off of 'em ambient too. But she was getting that natural high and sheer Martin I was thinking about. I was like, I really feel like all day from when I wake up to, when I go to bed, it's just natural high after natural Hyatt all day long, I didn't know that was possible.

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It can rewire. And, and that's what you want to do. And you talked about nature, which is so important and too many of us don't get out to connect. And the problem is when you sit in a room or in a home or an apartment, the energy is stagnant and there's no new stimulation and that is going to make your brain dormant. And you're doing the same thing over and over and over again, it makes your brain complacent. When you went out and took those walks, not only were you being present, which is a key and its own, right? Because when you're more present, you, you hit more of that list state. Then you are also being more available to different parts of you that you weren't always, it was always available. And it does it rewires your brain, which then in turn rewires, your DNA and your whole being.

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So you're on the right track. I think it's really important. And it is hard for people, you know, they live in New York city. I mean, it's hard to find ways to get out and do something. And that energy like New York city, its city's energy is so dense and I can't handle it more than a couple hours a day. Maybe the density is too much for me. Um, and so you have to find other ways maybe, you know, having plants, walking the Highline. I can't, I think that's what it's called in New York. Um, going down to someplace central park anywhere, um, not just in the store to buy more stuff, find a way to connect to nature in some way or another, that will help as well. So I think it's great. And it does give you an actual high absolutely. If you're present, but if you're just trying to get, you know, your walk over with, you're not going to experience the same experience.

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I know that I have it pretty easy living in Southern California, a block away from the beach. So what I wanted to recommend for other people is to just like you were saying, get more creative. You are also saying how, when you're in the house all the time in the same environment, then that actually has a negative impact on us because of we are wired to seek novelty. And so no novelty, if you're just home all the time. And I found myself cause I work from home, um, and the weather was bad here for a while. I found myself going stir crazy and even getting bored. And that's boredom has been out of my vocabulary for so many years. It's ridiculous. Can you remember? I'm like, am I actually bored and going stir crazy? And so then I was like, screw it. I'll just go for a walk in this crappy weather I would have, I have to get out of the house to do something.

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So I just want to encourage listeners if you don't live by the beach like me and Chris, and if you don't live in beautiful Sedona, Arizona, like Melissa with me on the call, get creative. There's there's ways to get creative. Even if you, all you can really do is put on a 4k nature, video on YouTube and have it on your TV. So at least there, if someone else is going on a nature hiker there's nature, cause even the pictures and the videos will have somewhat of a calming effect. Not of course not being submerged.

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Right? So part of what you're, what we miss as humans is that we're inside so much more, especially through COVID and it actually isn't healthy for us because we get a lot of, um, we don't just get external stimulation from nature. We also get vitamin D we, it helps us, our immunity being around bacteria. Like you said, even walking on the beach, you're getting a certain amount of immunity from putting your feet in the sand or in the dirt. Um, you know, when I come back from a hike, I mean I'm dirty my poor dog. I have to wash him because he's filthy. And even with that dirt, I know that that dirt has a certain components that probably will be healthy for my body. And so yes, walk, you know, seeing nature, but I encourage people to actually spend time with breathing outside. Even if it's three to four minutes, just walk outside and take some real breaths with real air, not the air that's been filtered or that, you know, has Dustin it, um, and, and breathe it in, take a walk in the rain.

(00:40:56):

I know it's not always, some people are like, Oh, I don't like the rain we'll find something positive to do. It's hard because all of these things and all of these things are just a bandaid for the inner work because the inner work is really let's go, what's going to make the major changes. If you go for a walk every day, it's not going to change your whole life, but what you want to do, maybe when you're going on and walk, make an intention. And I actually love to make intentions and I love to teach my clients to make intention. It's very simple process. So when you wake up in the morning, what's your intention. If you're just reaching for your phone, then your intention for the day is I'm a slave to what everybody else wants me to do.

(00:41:49):

So before you even get out of bed before you reach for your phone, make an intention. What is my intention for the day? I intend to have great relationships. I intend to flow through my day. I intend to see the beauty and grace in my day. I intend to whatever. Um, I personally, while even get out of bed. So I do have, and I changed things up just us like big spit. So I'm not always doing the same exact thing, but one thing I definitely always do every morning, even before I get out of bed in that moment and meditate and do my exercise. I go into my heart and I sit there and I say, my intention is to be fully present with an open heart, to love boldly and serve wisely. And I wait for my heart to be so open. And then I do one or two things and then I go meditate.

(00:42:47):

That's a great start to the morning, my goodness. And then you, when you put that up against the opposite of that, so yours is extremely proactive, intentional to the core. And then the other one, not check my email, check my Facebook, check my text messages, check my voicemail, check the news and see what's going on in the American political drama, reality show. Um, and yeah, those are great tips. I, so I don't do it right when I'm still in bed, but on my couch, pretty soon after I got off bed, I got my planner and my James clear habits journal. I write gratitude stuff, intentions, and, and here, and then maybe something else if I want to. And then my planner, and I'm just sitting here thinking, visualizing the gate the day, going good and really is like for people to change their life. It's, it's hard for sure, but it's very simple for, for a lot of people.

(00:43:44):

Um, for instance, just writing down, measuring what you do every day. So at the end of the day, write down everything that you did, approximately how much time if people just do that every single day, I watched five hours of TV. I was on Facebook for an hour. I did. And if you just do that every day and put it up on your refrigerator, you'll start to go, Holy crap. Do I really want, because unless you like, kind of see it, it's hard to really know just how much you're screwing up. And then when people start tracking and measuring, I did that once with going to Starbucks and spending money on Starbucks. And I did it once with eating out and I was like, Oh, I'm spending a fortune. This is crazy. Unless you track everything like that, or most of the things, how are you supposed to have a kind of a accurate and clear, you know, version of that like model of what's going on?

(00:44:37):

Yeah, absolutely. Because most of us go through our lives. Um, just in sleep mode, we're just doing the motions, but I want to just back up just a hair, if you don't mind, Matthew, um, one of the things that, the reason I do that ritual before I even get out of bed is because I just woke up. So I'm looking at brainwave patterns with this. So let's say I woke up from a dream or I just woke up from a dream and then I'm moving into that alpha, you know, I'm in that alpha theta, brainwave state, I'm more likely to that's when you're programmed. So I don't want to program my day in a beta or high beta state. I want to program my day in a alpha theta brainwave state, because when I program it in that state, then I'm programming it in my subconscious mind more than my conscious mind. And that's why I kind of do it that way. Um, and that's why I do it that way. It's all, to me, it's all about the brain patterns. And then I meditate when then I get into those brainwave patterns. Then I hit some high gamma and those meditations, which is like frickin amazing, like knock your socks off bliss, crazy brain orgasm type of experience. Um, and then, and then I start my day and it's hard. Sometimes I want to reach for that phone. I mean,

(00:46:10):

Working on your business and start doing funds cause your life's great, you know? So you want to get going with all that stuff. Yeah.

(00:46:17):

And I'm tired of I'm, you know, I'm one of those people I'm always looking like, I'm always asking spirit, how can I serve? What can I do? And I get a lot of inspiration and I love to implement. So I love the inspiration because I'm super, you know, I'm very spiritual. That's who I am, but I'm also very grounded and practical. So I'm always thinking, like I just talked to my sister who does some VA work for me. And I was like, I need a whole spreadsheet for how to do my, um, awake TV series. I'm starting a M a S T V series. And I was like, yeah, I know I'm so excited. Um, between that and the podcast I'm busy, but, um, I was like, get a whole spreadsheet because I w I want to be organized and grounded. I don't want to be out in the ethers.

(00:47:09):

I want to be grounded. That's what I'm here for. But I want to program myself really early on in the day. So then my day is kick and that doesn't mean crap doesn't happen. You know, you got that phone call that you're like, Whoa. You know? And then you're like, okay, I could see this as a negative, or I could see where the beauty is in it, but in the grace and the love in that. And, um, that happened to me. It did, I, I was all bummed out because I have to change banks because my bank is closing. I do everything online and dealing with that kind of thing just drains me. But then I was like, wait a minute. Is this straining me? Or am I, am I a victim to this? Or, or am I, how can I see it differently? And I was like, no, this is great. I feel like this is actually a really good bank. I'm looking at the names. I'm like, this is perfect. So yeah.

(00:48:04):

You, you, you, uh, challenge that initial reaction, reactive reaction thought, and then you one, you said, Nope. So you won that challenge. Like I challenge you thought, yes.

(00:48:16):

I call on you thought

(00:48:19):

There's two people I want to bring up right now based on what you've been saying, Dr. Wayne Dyer, who recently passed it, you know, a few years ago.

(00:48:27):

Do you know who, do you know who on the other side is in charge of awake TV,

(00:48:33):

But please tell me Wayne. Yes. Okay. So that's

(00:48:38):

Your sun coming up over and over and over again. It's hysterical. I know. He's like, yeah. He's yep. Anyway, go ahead.

(00:48:48):

One of his quotes, when you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change. Yes.

(00:48:54):

It's all about perception,

(00:48:55):

The Ascension process. I want to talk some about that. So you're, you're big into the Ascension thing. Could you just basically describe it in simple terms for people like me and many others that don't know? Cause I do I know somewhat about it, but I'd love to hear your, what is this Ascension that we're in the process of we're right at the precipice you said, and it's like 10 years long. So what's going on in the context.

(00:49:21):

Yeah. It's longer than that, but we're going to, it's going to be like a little wonky for a while and it is, it's just going to be wonky. Ascension is really about us as a collective energy as humans shifting and changing from an old paradigm into a new paradigm. And this is just the evolutionary process and think about it in the way of what ha what we had 10 years ago in technology is so different than what we have here today. This is about conscious evolution and there's only one way to move. So we've come from a very dense NRG system. And that dense energy system is his sitting more in what we would call like the lower chakras. And so the third chakra is all about fear and control. Now, if that does not sum up what the last 50 years has been and longer before that, but especially the last 50 years, what else could a B?

(00:50:30):

So this, this lower Shakur has been going on for thousands and thousands of years. This third chakra stuff we're moving into the heart. So the Ascension is about moving from fear and control and to love and compassion. Now, if you look around, people are shifting. A lot of people are trying to shift how they perceive their environment. And the old way of fear is really trying to pull us back into fear and we can do grandpa's way, or we could break blaze a new path. And guru's lit workers. Intuitives have talked about this for the Aquarian age for ever. And, you know, back in the sixties, um, you know, all that love Aquarian age business, we were not in the Aquarian age at that time, but that's what they were seeing, what they were sensing. That's what the astrologers were talking about and what this really means for us as everyone, the Ascension is happening.

(00:51:45):

We are moving from a lower consciousness into a higher consciousness. It doesn't mean it's an end result. Doesn't mean that like some people are going to get it and other people aren't, it's happening to everyone. Whether you understand it or not, or you know, what about it or not, or you're into it or not, it's already happening. And as someone who has been in the spiritual world for a long time, I've watched this progression. And what I've noticed with this Ascension is that people are looking for something to fulfill themselves in a different way. It's not about money. It's not about prestige. It's not about the ego's needs. It's more about how can I feel fulfilled with, and I love that because that's what we need. If more people were fulfilled inside than we treat each other better, then we'd feel more compassion over someone who is going through an addiction, then being angry at them or saying you've ruined my life.

(00:52:53):

Um, and, and it is kind of like, it's not a utopian society. I want you to understand that it's not like, okay, so today we're all in anger and fear. And tomorrow we're all going to be in love and light, and everybody's got to hug and kiss. It's an evolution. So we're, we may falter a little backward. We may feel more ego. We may be less present in this moment. And that's okay. Because even when you, you trip backward a little bit there's movement. And it's interesting because Ascension is really about the addiction process. It's about moving from a place of being a victim or controlled by a substance, into moving into a sovereignty and to our own individual self and looking for our own joy and happiness within can't come from outside. You've tried that everyone who's addicted has tried to look outside of themselves for love and joy.

(00:54:01):

And we know it doesn't work that way. And what's happening with the Ascension basically is that we are evolving as a species and it's happening no matter what's happening, no matter COVID or anything else. And I actually believe that COVID was a springboard for people to say, why do I really want my life? Like here? I was, you know, driving an hour and a half to work each way, spending three hours on the freeway, is this what I want? So people have really, re-evaluated all sorts of people have re-evaluated their life and said, is this really what I want? And that's because the Ascension that has nothing to do with COVID COVID was the catalyst. So think of everything in your life is what is the catalyst that has propelled me into this direction or that direction. And you can use that in addiction. What catalyst propelled me forward in that addiction? What was the catalyst that made me break up with that person that I actually found love for someone different? What was the catalyst that made me question is this who I want to be in my life. So always look at what's the catalyst, because that's propelling us either back deeper into the addiction or out of the addiction, deeper into the Ascension or out of the essential, not out, you can't go out of the Ascension, but more toward the Ascension or, or moving back into grandpa's time.

(00:55:45):

And I love catalysts. So, and correct me if I'm wrong. It sounds like what you're saying is the catalyst that people are re-evaluating things right now is the Ascension, the precipice of the Ascension. And also COVID act as an accelerant in a bunch of areas, including the Ascension

(00:56:04):

100%. And it's crazy because I remember when the end of 19 2019 happened, I was like, Oh, 2020 is going to kick us in the. I was like, it's going to really propel this Ascension forward. I never would have predicted this. And the way it went out about, I'm not a predictive person. I don't predict things anyway. That's not who I am, but I was like, wow. And I'm watching it. And I'm watching what's happening. I'm watching how people are reacting and I'm watching all this spiritual community. And then same thing happened at the end of 2020, where we were kicked in the. I mean, I'm spiritual people. I know a lot of spiritual people and they're like, Holy Toledo, 2020, and like kicked me in the. Now at the end of 2020 in December, I actually got COVID. And where what's the weird thing is that I hike alone.

(00:57:05):

Most of the time, I don't have, I have a very small, I don't even have a lot of friends in my area. Um, everything I do is online. Um, I don't eat out much. So I got COVID from someone who lived with me that I, I opened my home to, to help her out. Um, and I infected zero people by the way. Zilcho not one person that I, um, in fact, but I'm telling you right now is just telling my sister, my gut is better and better health. I don't think any colonoscopy, colon hydrotherapy, or supplements, I've done all that stuff. My gut health is in the best it's ever been. And I think it's because I went through COVID. I think it changed my personal DNA. Now, now that may be creepy for some people and they may not get that. And I would definitely not say, go get COVID because I was sick, but something shifted in me.

(00:58:03):

So I think that things and because of who I am, I, I know everything happens for a reason in my life and it didn't make me feel down or out. Um, you know, some of it wasn't pleasant, but I came out of it. I feel a different person. And I was asking, how else can I shift my physical body and my ego? And boy, I got kicked in the teeth for the last two years around that. And, um, but I wanted it and I don't regret one thing that's happened to me in the last couple of years and a lot has happened.

(00:58:45):

So one of the biggest lessons that you taught me that I've continued to, for the most part to this day, that whenever I start to like, get a little freaked out over things, your voice just, that just comes in, like everything is happening as it's supposed to go. And everything's perfect, you know, non attachment, just being okay with life as it unfolds, that was such a surrender. Just let it just, and really, man, I'd love talking to you, Melissa, but I don't want to hog your whole day. Where can people find you you've been on before obviously, but what are the best websites? What are your best products services, where people can learn more? And of course we'll put them in the show notes as well. Yeah,

(00:59:32):

That would be great. Um, so it's Melissa Fike, it's F like Frank E I C k.com. So, um, that's my website on my website. I have, um, a divine love meditation and that you can find on the front page. It is a great meditation for opening up your heart, connecting, um, through giving and receiving. So most people are really good at giving, but receiving is also always difficult for people. So I love that meditation. It does put you on my email list, but you can absolutely get right off. Um, no, I want it, it is for free, but of course, you know, we, we do have to, like, some people want to know more so they can know more through being on my email list. And then also, um, my podcast it's called spiritual expansion and Ascension. Um, and I give all sorts of information and it's a little spiritual, but a lot of it's very practical, um, emotional mental tools because I'm really, um, a coach that wants to help people transcend and transmute their lower energies into being more fully aligned with who their soul self is. So yeah.

(01:00:50):

It's well, your podcast is, I'm a huge fan. I left a five star rating and review. And what I like about your podcast so much, and also the divine love meditation. I can't recommend that enough. And I opened pretty much every email you send I'm on your list. But what I love about your podcast is like, if someone else were saying some of the things, it might sound like airy fairy, but you blend like spirituality metaphysics with quantum physics, psychology philosophy, sociology, just, you blend so many things together and it's, you put scientific things in there and just powerful. Like I was reading the other reviews too. I'm like this, your podcast is going to blow up eventually. So hopefully I want to recommend to all you listeners, if you've enjoyed this episode of her podcast is sensational. It's only been out for a couple of months, but I've been eating up the episodes that at double speed. All right, Melissa. So Melissa Fike F E I C k.com. There's the divine love meditation. People can get that and they can unsubscribe if they want to, just to get, but I don't recommend doing that because your email they're free emails and they're great tips. And your podcast is called the spiritual

(01:02:08):

Expansion and Ascension it's spiritual expansion and Ascension. Yeah,

(01:02:17):

Melissa. Again, this was a great round to do, knocked it out of the park. Um, thank you so much and have a

(01:02:24):

Wonderful, thank you.